Today, I’m going to bring out my inner Emma Watson and discuss some key points of feminism that are directly for men and reason why feminism is not just an all-female movement. This is also where the concept of “Men’s Rights Activism” began – and don’t get me started on the absurdity of the things meninists are fighting for because the true fight for men’s rights stands within feminism.
It’s common for statements such as “feminists want all men to die” or “all feminists are lesbians” to be said when the topic of feminism is brought up in a casual discussion. Although some feminists are not heterosexual, which is entirely okay, it should be known that feminists do not want the existence of the male species to end, but rather want men to fully inhabit their full character, in a non-patriarchal society.
What do you mean by “full character”?
There is a certain set of qualities that society deems what a man “should” be and what a woman “should” be, and both are entirely opposite.
Being manly equates with being:
- strong (and looking like it! Because thin, scrawny guys are normally put down)
- not emotional – unless the emotion is anger or jealousy. What do most people call a guy that cries? Hint: it starts with a ‘p’.
- interested in cars, sports, or violence
- not a virgin
The list doesn’t end there because there are a series of expectations and notions brought upon men that alters everyone’s perception of them. Women are raised to not walk alone at night because men may rape them or young girls can’t wear clothing perfect for hot weather to school because the boys may be distracted. Both of these creates the notion that all men are perverted and have no control – but it’s fine, they’re just being men. Men, who are dirty, messy. Men are raised to play with toy cars and like everything that is coloured blue. The phrase, “a real man…” is too often said. The media teaches us that the desired type of man is physically strong, rich, aesthetically pleasing, smart, tall, “hung”, is a player/stud who possesses a decent amount of sexual experience.
Why not change the name from “feminism” to something else then?
Feminism doesn’t need to be renamed to something more “equal” because it’s already fighting for equality. It inherently states “fem” in it because it is the feminine qualities that both men and women are shamed for. Women are expected to be emotional, weak, dainty, small, and not “slutty” but not virgins either, domestic, submissive – everything that men are believe not to be. We are fighting for men, because when things change for men, it could change for women too. If it was more acceptable for men to be short, tall women would not be seen as unattractive. If men could be emotional, women could be strong and direct without seeming like a bitch. If men didn’t have to be so composed, the emotions of women wouldn’t make us out to be “crazy”. If a woman’s sexual promiscuity was accepted, a man’s lack of one would be too.
As the above photo implicates, feminists are not against men. We want you to be everything you are, and not have to reject parts of yourself to fit a “man” should be, or be self-conscious because you don’t possess the same qualities of the perfect guy. We don’t believe that all men are rapists or abusers. We want you to have the same chance at receiving custody of your children as women do because the notion that women are better caregivers and men aren’t is a part of patriarchy. We understand that your fear of jail comes from the existence of prison rape, which we don’t want for you. We don’t want false accusations of rape to be consistently pressed upon men – it’s unfair to you if you’re innocent, and it’s unfair to the women who have been assaulted, or may be assaulted in the future. We don’t want you to feel pressured to pay for dinner all the time, or to be expected to take on all family responsibilities that aren’t domestic. We want the existence of male eating disorders, suicide, abuse and rape cases to not only stop, but to also be brought the same awareness and empathy that female cases are given.
Feminists are your friends. Women are your friends. We are your allies, not your enemy.